Gala gala

I was fortunate enough to get into the

SCAD Seen Gala for free.

Tickets ranged from $150 to $275.

Yikes!

With these prices, it was no wonder that

the people sauntering through

4C were some pretty swanky people.

The gala is a scholarship for SCAD -

students and teachers create work,

rich people bid on it,

and the money goes to scholarships.

Every year they showcase a different major.

I think I came during a great year -

fashion was the focus.

They set up platforms for each student designer,

and they sold their work to these swanky people.

The food.

THE FOOD!

I wanted to take a picture of all

the stuff I ate, but I was scared I was

going to drop something.

But let me tell you -

YUMMY.

I didn't stay for the ice cream.

(Fun fact: Pretty sure that ^ will be the title of

my collection of creative fiction

should I ever publish one.)

My bun started falling apart,

so I knew it was time to leave.

Plus, my feet were killing me

from crashing down onto the concrete floor

with every step in my high heels.

Fear

I don't think doing good things means

that good things will happen to you.

Or maybe I just haven't been a

good enough person these past 21 years.

I don't know what I'm doing wrong.

Why no great opportunities are opening

up for me.

Maybe it's my incessant complaining

instead of incessant hard work.

I don't know what the key is.

I don't know what I should be doing with my life.

I'm afraid that all of this indecision - 

all of this wondering will continue my whole life

and I will have died with a pointless,

mindless

existence.

I didn't realize it until I got home from New York,

but I am so afraid that I will do

nothing meaningful with my life.

I had always heard people say that,

but I never understood until I went to New York

and got my hopes up.

I never knew I would be so afraid of that.

City Never Sleeps

I went to New York this weekend for an interview.
The interview bombed.

I'm still trying to work out how the whole thing in my head.

Until I can sort out my feelings, here's a video.